As Nandini (dressed in gorgeous red saree) and Vanraj get ready to meet up with Sameer; I turned to my daughter, who was intensely watching the movie, and asked her to predict the climax of the movie!
Without blinking an eye, she said, “Of course, Aishwarya will stay with Ajay. There is no way she is going to go back to Salman!!!”… All of fourteen years, and her clarity of thought was amazing! Especially, given the passionate love story in the first half between Aish and Salman, as a first timer watching the movie, one would imagine the story might tilt the other side!
My daughter & I have watched umpteen number of movies together. We laughed and we cried (eghh… small correction… I am the one who cries watching emotional scenes and she gets frustrated watching her dad trying to hide his emotions!).
She is a typical Gen Z… and I am a typical Gen X, but (fortunately) we both enjoy watching the 90s and 2000s hit Bollywood movies! Most Friday evenings are the movie nights at home.
I used to be a movie buff myself and a big fan of Sharukh and my daughter picked up both the traits from me. She watched all SRK movies starting from DDLJ, DTPH, KKHH, Mohabbatein to Chak De! When it comes to Telugu movies – Siddharth and Nani movies are our favorites.
There are movies which we are not tired of watching on repeat – ‘Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara’ and ‘Yeh Jawani Hai Diwani’ for instance. In ZNMD, I closely associate myself with Hrithik’s role – suited, booted, workaholic and purpose driven. I would ask my kiddoo which role she would associate herself with and she would open up about herself, her friends and cousins and how all of them relate themselves to the characters in ZNMD. ZNMD is one of the best movies where each character has a finesse and charm of their own and each of the characters are relatable for any age group of people.
In ‘Yeh Jawani Hai Diwani’, the scene where Kabir (Ranbir) wants to cover the whole city and its sightseeing places that evening and Naina (Deepika) wants him to slow down, enjoy and live in the moment.
I would turn to my daughter and ask her what she would do in that situation – would she explore everything within the small window of time or just enjoy and live in the moment! She loves both the characters in the movie and she relates to both of them at different situations. She would talk about what travel means to her and how she would go about exploring things on her own and with her friends. The relatability with movies and its characters is what I felt makes a very charming discussion with this generation.
The one movie that we debated the most is ‘Taare Zameen Par’. She gets psyched up talking about that movie. My point of view is that Darsheel’s (Ishaan) father role is portrayed in a very bad light. I would defend his character and his intention behind putting the kid in a boarding school. My daughter would fiercely argue against that mindset and we both debate for hours about parenting, discipline, societal pressures, parental obligations, need to study well and importance of exams, marks etc. None of which she would agree with me! She would bracket me into the oldie’s mindset and lecture me on how times are changing, GenZ Vs. GenX, and how studies are not the only thing kids of her age need to worry about!
Indeed… engaging with teenagers can be quite a task!
They think differently… they value things differently… and they certainly behave differently! The poor us (parents), are caught in the never-ending loop of trying to instill the age-old value system and at the same time, trying to be friendly and talk to them in their own language!
As my kiddoo transitioned from being a toddler who always wanted to see me around, to a young adult who is happy to see me as seldom as possible, I feel I have matured as a parent myself!
It almost feels like I have had a role reversal from being the fun-loving, energy-filled Raj Aryan Malhotra of Mohabbatein to the strict Gurukul chief Narayan Shankar in front of my daughter!!!
… and as I utter that heavy baritone dialogue – “Parampara, Pratishtha, Anushasan”; my daughter rolls her eyes, utters “what in the world!” in the typical GenZ way… and simply goes back to her room!
In all of this, what I find incredibly useful is that these movie dates with her helped both of us have open discussions about career, future, love, marriage, relationships etc. An open and honest conversations with a teenaged girl who is growing up to be an independent lady getting ready to face the world!
We may not be able to understand or appreciate each other’s worlds which are distanced through age, gender and generational gaps but at least there is a common ground to discuss and debate and be open about them!
… and that is where I find the true father-daughter bonding and perhaps a bridge between two generations!
